Illusory

Illusory

Unshod walks towards you 

My white socks are asphalt-stained;

The new dress I wore, the smile you knew

Was too good to be true.

To my confidence: I say sorry,

     for all the illusory you have caused me.

Eyelashes-length patience

fluttering for daylight

Through your esoteric dark mind,

where cruel ideations hide.

To my head: I say sorry,

     for all the illusory you have caused me.

Kitschy as I am, you still handed me attention

Comes with words of affirmation, I can’t help

but question your intention;

You saw me as a vacation.

To my conscience: I say sorry,

     for all the illusory you have caused me.

A friendship I hoped that lasted

and remained the way it was,

I ache for the love you wasted

comes with the rebuilding of trusts;

To myself, I say sorry,

     for all the illusory you have caused me.